The play of Atma

Part A has a temporary existence. Part B does not, and it takes many Part A’s. If Part B decides to take a body, it will take one.

SC: I understand. But then how do you explain the fact that Atma creates experiences that don’t result in the feeling of Love? For example, so many sad things are happening.

Mahaprabu: It does not want to create those experiences. In order to enjoy the love that is in-built, it uses the knowing-thinking-performing to create experiences. On the way to enjoying the love, when the knowing, thinking, performing does not happen correctly, it leads to so-called adverse situations. Unknowingly it ends up in sad situations. Do people enjoy sadness all the time? No. They all try to come out of sadness. Who is that ‘they’? The same part B! It wants to come out of sadness. How? Again through knowing, thinking, performing. Intelligence is growing! It then reaches the right track after sadness goes, and after several such experiences, one day it eventually returns to Godliness. Sadness is not its goal. It is a milestone on the journey. See, this is the whole play. It is full of Love and Joy. But it gives the appearance as though it has forgotten it; then to re-experience this Love and Joy, it creates sense organs, sense objects, stumbles quite a bit along the way, and finally comes to experience itself, Appadi! (a sound of relief) After such a journey I have found home!

It is like a child playing on the beach. It will build a house of sand. It will enjoy building it, and it will enjoy the house. Won’t let anyone come near it in case they might break it. But after it has enjoyed playing with the sand house, the child itself will destroy it. There is joy in that destruction too. That’s the game. ‘I won’t let others steal the joy of destroying it!’

SC: So, Atma also plays with its creations similarly.

Mahaprabu: The child I am talking about is who?? Atma. Don’t think ‘child’ is a separate entity from Atma. IT IS ATMA. It is a sample. Like that, Atma is taking so many appearances and exhibiting its nature through those appearances. What is its purpose? In creating, protecting and destructing, in all three acts its purpose is Joy. Like that child. (Laughing!!) If Joy was in the house will it break the house? Was there joy in the sand? No. The Atma appearing as a child, brings out the Joy through the sand. It uses the play with sand to bring out the joy. Like that, the Atma uses everything in the world. This is how Atma (like all these beings) is playing every moment, with everything, using various bodies. Once it is done playing, just as it destroyed the house and moved on, it destroys the body and moves on!!! So it enjoyed creating the body, enjoyed protecting the body, and enjoys destroying the body. (Laughing!)

There is no loss in it at all for Atma. That’s why it is playing for fun. We cry and say ‘the body is gone’ after death, but really is that true? It becomes ash and is still there. Just like when someone destroys the house built by the child and the child cries ‘Oh the house is gone’, the mother says, ‘look it didn’t go anywhere. The house is in the sand only! Build another one!’

See how it is giving examples when I talk to you!

So, we all have the love in us, just like there is air. But it needs to flow a bit to give joy as a breeze. The love in us is there. It needs to be kindled to be brought out. All this knowing, thinking, performing is for what? What is the purpose? It is to bring out the Love so that it can enjoy the Love. It is experiencing it. Enjoying it.

What is Awakening?

SC: Is awakening then the final love?

Mahaprabu: Here is what awakening is. Everything I’ve said so far is a result of awakening only. While saying it also there is a continuous flow of Love and it is being enjoyed! I am enjoying it continuously. Since I am centered correctly, aligned, i.e. “knowing-thinking-performing is purely to bring out the love and enjoy the happiness” – this is in alignment in me before, during, and after I speak with you. That is awakening. You on the other hand, have heard all of this, but the alignment is missing. Still you have to awaken.

SC: Understood, but awakening also is part of the play of Atma right?

Mahaprabu: Laughing… You have asked this question two days ago also. You just are asking it in a different way. See how you are thinking too much. If I tell you ‘Yes, awakening also is part of the play of Atma,’ you will say ‘Then why bother? It will happen one day.’ Look closely. Part-and-parcel of that awakening process is what is happening now!! We are talking as part of that process! This didn’t happen earlier. It is happening now! So to answer your question, Yes, Awakening which is part of the play of Atma is happening now! But if you think, ‘Let it awaken.’ you will come right back into Maya. Guru is trying to get you out of Maya. So don’t think too much! (Laughing). Everything is moving correctly. I am sharing what happened in my experience. You have listened to everything. Is there anything you have not understood? No. Clearly you have understood. Then what is the difference between you and me? It is this: Several moments are ahead. Today, tomorrow, etc. Each and every one of those moments is the exact same for me. The next second, day, week, and year are all the same for me as it is NOW. But will it be like that for you?

SC: No. I see. For me the understanding is just knowledge.

Mahaprabu: What I told you is a wonderful Truth. Nothing more needs to be said to make you understand. Beyond that, I cannot tell you the experience of Awakening. All I can say is that, if you Awaken, you will feel like I feel. If not you will feel like you feel right now. From this we can tell, awakening has not happened in you. But it will happen. The only faith is: “We are with an awakened one.”

Why Faith is needed

Here is the problem: Let’s say a blind person is with someone who can see. How should the blind man feel? Happy. Because he is with someone with eyes! But what is he thinking about the other person? How do I know that you can see? (Laughing!!) Only if I know you can see, I will believe you!! (SC: Beautiful example. There is no way you can prove it to him that you can see. Since he is blind!! What a beautiful example. Mahaprabu was laughing so much.) Yes! Write this example down and stick it somewhere! The title can be ‘Why faith is needed.’ A blind man says to his friend: You are telling me you can see and that you can save me. But how do I know you can see? (Laughing!!).

For example, let’s say the man who can see takes the blind man somewhere. On the way say there are holes/dents in the ground. The friend who can see will guide the blind man carefully through them. But as soon as he feels the ground going in, the blind person shouts ‘Hey, can’t you see? It appears to be a hole.’ So the blind one doubts the one who can see. So if he is intelligent, the one who can see will never prove to the blind that he can see. Why? Because he can never prove it. Only if he is a fool he will try to prove it. But the blind one will continuously use all situations to prove to himself that the other person is blind too! This is the situation between disciple and Guru!!! At every step the Guru will never try to prove that he is awakened. But at every step the disciple will doubt him. So what does the Guru do? He works to develop faith in the disciple. Till then it is difficult.

When will the faith develop? As long as there is doubt, you are not even in the zone of faith. How can there be doubt and faith at the same time? So, first he has to come out of doubt (SC: Right, the absence of doubt is faith!) Yes. It is like this. As the blind one struggles, watching his struggles the one who can see sheds tears of compassion. Then the blind one touches the face of the companion and feels the tears. That is when he realizes, ‘Oh God, how much compassion he has for me. How much he has worked for me.’ Then alone, faith starts. Similarly, only when the disciple comes to realize how much the Guru is working hard (padaadha paadu padarar) for the disciple’s sake, only then faith and love will develop in him. But initially how it is? The disciple feels the Guru is making the disciple’s life really hard!! (padaadha paadu paduthharar). Once the disciple’s knowing-thinking-performance process learns that ‘He is not making my life really hard; He is working really hard for me. It is Me who has made His life really hard’, (Laughing!) that is the breaking point; the melting point! That is the point where he breaks. Now you tell me, can this be forced to happen? Can it happen by understanding? No. It takes its own time. You cannot force it. I cannot prove it. So, that is where Grace comes into the Play!! (laughing).

See how much patience the Guru must have. Tremendous patience. He knows the disciple doesn’t have faith. He cannot prove it to him. He will be patient, knowing that once the disciple knows, he will change totally; he will know how helpful the Guru has been, and how distrustful he himself has been; Then he will truly realize he has been blind! He will feel the real blindness. Until then he wouldn’t have felt so bad about his blindness. He will realize: Not only have I been blind physically. I have been blind mentally too.

So, just being quietly in surrender is the only work. Otherwise, the entire life will go in distrust of the Master. Finally when he realizes that ‘Oh! So much time I wasted. Now I can see.’ That is the moment of Awakening. That is Enlightenment. This is what the Guru tries to do through this relationship.

Nallapadiya nadakkatum. (May all happen well)
Love you so much.
Gurudeva.

With these words Sri Mahaprabu ended the call.