Who is a Disciple? You will be surprised to find out the answer. When does one need to be a Witness and when should even Witnessing disappear? Why the proximity to a living Master is crucial. How it all happens. Sri Mahaprabu describes the role of the Witness by using a beautiful example. A short and powerful talk.
How it Happens
SC talked about the experience he had this morning from waking and that there was the usual upward pull (physical feeling) that he was able to witness throughout. There wasn’t much of a mind left.
Mahaprabu: Wonderful. But that witness too has to disappear. (SC: Amazed at how he always puts me in place! And he does it with so much love that there is no hurt felt whatsoever). The goal is not to remember and share the experience etc. This is not an exam to pass. Unarvunilayil kalandhu kanaamal podhal dhan unnoda vela. (Referring to the 3rd law/practice of Sri Mahaprabu which translates to: Disappearing and dissolving in the feeling of Unarvu (existence)). That is your job. Not to keep witnessing and recording the experiences. As long as you are there, THAT experience will not happen.
See, witnessing should happen only when you are out of the Experience. In fact when you are out of the experience (referring to all other times e.g. day to day activities etc) the only Role allowed for you is that of a Disciple. Not father, not husband, not spiritual aspirant. Only Disciple. And that disciple predominantly Witnesses everything. Talk but don’t identify as the Talker. Witness it. See but don’t identify as the Seer. Perform actions but do not identify as the Doer. Witness it. This is hard initially but as you do it, this will become your comfort mode. For this you have to reduce to a great extent the amount of talking, the amount of seeing and the amount of doing. Hence the role of a Disciple. Where besides doing the very basic actions needed for the survival of you and those who depend on you, all other actions are only those done as Seva to the Guru.
Importance of physical proximity to the Guru
Being such a Disciple is the shortest path to the Lover (THAT). Like a cow tied to a peg, the rope is the disciple role. When you are a disciple you are not taking on any other Roles, and no more distractions because at any moment the Experience may come, and only then can you will be available for it. That is why physical proximity to the Guru is so critical because only when there is a physical connection there is a higher chance for a mental connection. And this mental connection is what is needed. When you are physically far away from the Guru there is less chance for mental connection (unless the disciple is highly mature and tuned with the Guru) and the experience will not happen.
Lover example
It is like this. There is a beautiful girl who lives in the house and there is an equally handsome boy who comes near her house and sees her a few times. Things start to happen between them but at that point he goes away to a far-off place. She looks for him once or twice and as he is not around, she soon completely forgets about him. At the same time there is another boy who is not that great looking, but he is very much attracted to her and is willing to do anything just to see her. So he makes himself physically available in front of her house as much as possible. Simply waiting for her. At the rare times when she comes outside, she sees him waiting. In fact she would see him from inside too, but the boy doesn’t know that. (An important point since a Disciple needs to be cheerful even in trying situations). Even then she sees him waiting with joy, not with frustration because it is hot, or because it is raining but with Joy. He is waiting just with the single hope of seeing her. And every time he sees her, his love only increases. Now think about it from the girl’s standpoint. At one point or the other will she not start liking him and soon loving him?
Disciple means Witnessing
That is how you have to wait for the Experience. And the shortest path to that experience is that of the Witness; i.e. being a witness at all times. That is the definition of a Disciple. Disciple is not the body. Disciple means that Witnessing at all times, that Attention. There will be so many pressures that will prevent the boy from standing there. His parents wouldn’t like it, passersby wouldn’t like it. But despite all that if he is able to stay there then there is a chance that when she comes out, they may get the experience. Similarly when a Disciple renounces all actions which distract him from the goal, he is bound to face tremendous pressure from all sides. Family, work, his own mind, etc. It takes tremendous sincerity to not get affected by those pressures and stay true to his goal.
Now while the boy is waiting, he does not simply stand there. Because he would naturally become frustrated soon. So he might start doing small activities in front of the house like planting a tree or some activity just to be there without being kicked out. All these activities are just like Seva (Service) to the Guru. Because the body cannot and should not sit idle, especially in the early stages. That is why Mahaprabu strongly recommends Seva.
This is the way it happens
Mahaprabu had the same situation. [Note that these are all still Sri Mahaprabu’s words. He is using the name ‘Mahaprabu’, and the pronoun ‘he’ in the 3rd person]. Upon graduating from college, he had so much pressure to leave Tiruvannamalai to find a job, earn money, support his family well, etc. But even though he worked hard and graduated, he had no desire for anything else except to be in Tiruvannamalai. He was determined to know the Truth there or die but would not leave. And because of his unfaltering devotion to the goal, nature found a way to keep him there. A polytechnic college opened and he was offered the job of a lecturer.
In physical life also Mahaprabu had this experience with his lover (referring to his now wife). But before marriage in his sadhana days, the girl questioned why he was not giving her importance and always focusing on some inner goal, he simply told her ‘This is my first priority. Everything else including you is second. If you cannot live with that you can leave. Even if she had asked him this question after marriage that would have been his same response.
In spirituality, people don’t have this kind of determination and sincerity to stick to the sadhana. They might get an early experience or two, but they don’t stick on. Soon they lose hope in their own ability. They declare within themselves that it is impossible. So they leave. How can it happen if you yourself don’t believe it can happen?
This is the only way (Living the life of a Disciple as defined above). If a physical relationship requires that much dedication, imagine wanting to attain God. You never know when he will give you even the next glimpse. He could make you wait for years. Tremendous patience is needed. And he sees whether you are waiting with frustration or with love. See, just like the boy outside the girl’s house who knows for sure that she is there, and one day or the other she will come out and meet him, you know IT is there inside you. One day or the other IT is going to come out. i.e. IT is going to give you the experience. IT WILL.
Importance of Satsang
[Sri Mahaprabu then gave a second example]. Think about a girl getting married into a joint family. She came from a happy, independent life-style at her house but now not only does she have to serve her husband, but she also has to take care of his parents, brothers, sisters and all those living in the joint family [This was very common in India until recently]. If she starts living with the attitude that I had so much freedom before marriage and now I am in shackles and have to serve so many people, her life would be miserable. What would be her relationship with her husband? Miserable. But the same girl if she accepts the situation and says ‘From now on this is going to be my life so I better do it happily’ and soon she studies everyone and starts serving them with love, imagine her life how positive it would be. And if her husband and others were good people, imagine the love they would shower on her. Many years ago joint families were common. But before that there must have been a time when they were no joint families correct? Infact there was a time where even marriage didn’t exist. Today joint families are very rare. But say there was a joint family, is it not possible for a girl to adapt to it successfully as described above? What would that girl need? The right attitude correct? It is all about how she develops herself, and trains herself to live with that attitude. It can be done. Same thing is with the Gurukulam. (Referring to the Resthouse) There was a time when Gurukulams were quite common in India. Today they are very rare. When a seeker enters a Gurukulam, he needs to accept the situation there and serve not only the Guru with love but also serve all his disciples and perform so many tasks with love. If he does that, then imagine the Guru’s love towards him or her. Instead, if you come into the Gurukulam and say I will only love the Guru but not adjust to the other disciples and serve those disciples well, then how will you progress?
We should treat this Gurukulam (Resthouse is the term Mahaprabu gave to the place where his disciples live) with such respect and make full use of it. This is a very rare opportunity that has been given to you all. Do not waste it.
Nallapadiya nadakkatum. May it happen well.
Gurudeva.
Love you. Love you.
With the above words, Sri Mahaprabu ended the call.
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